


Voices of Genosha - One-Ply Toilet Paper is BANNED.

by Quill18



Series: Voices of Genosha [1]
Category: X-Men (Alternate Timeline Movies), X-Men (Movieverse), X-Men - All Media Types
Genre: Erik Logic is Best Logic, Gen, Genosha, Podfic, erik lehnsherr hates 1-ply toilet paper
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-20
Updated: 2019-06-20
Packaged: 2020-05-15 02:45:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 200
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19286512
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Quill18/pseuds/Quill18
Summary: "Citizens, residents, and visitors; I have an announcement to make.I have banned the sale of one-ply toilet paper from our fair and lovely country."---Recorded podfic/rewritten old fic of Magneto banning 1-ply toilet paper from Genosha. After all, mutants deserve the best.





	Voices of Genosha - One-Ply Toilet Paper is BANNED.

**Author's Note:**

> Credits:  
> Writer/Quill18/EelWaffles  
> Fic/Art Tumblr: https://quill18fandom.tumblr.com/  
> Tikkum Olam:Genosha Project Website: https://quill18.weebly.com/
> 
> Magneto/Radmax525: https://twitter.com/radmax525?lang=en
> 
> Sound Editor/Cass: https://twitter.com/JestersOrders?lang=en

The actual podfic is here: https://www.podomatic.com/podcasts/voicesofgenosha/episodes/2019-06-19T17_25_18-07_00

Recording listed above.

Transcript:

"Citizens, residents, and visitors; I have an announcement to make.

I have banned the sale of one-ply toilet paper from our fair and lovely country.

I will not have precious resources wasted on importing inferior product.

Inferior product that chafes across delicate parts when we relieve ourselves, inferior product that leaves us to suffer abominable unpleasant textures when swiped across our nether regions.

No more.

As mutants, as the next step in human evolution, we have a duty to our human siblings, to the parent species that led to our existence, to show them a better way of life. A better way of life that includes luxurious toilet paper.

Relieving oneself should be a luxurious pleasant part of the day. After all, you are cleansing yourself of bodily waste, it is more productive to make a disgusting task as enjoyable as possible, since all of us must undergo it

. As the last of the inferior toilet paper leaves our markets, expect 3 and 4-ply toilet paper to be on store shelves by week's end, produced from hemp and bamboo paper, recycled and sustainable."


End file.
